It is no news flash that our family has had our share of ups and downs. Although the ups have been really good, the downs have been pretty tough. I suppose it is only human nature that allows the mind, heart, and soul to feel the scars of pain more than the joys of life. Joy comes and goes, but pain is always with us, or so it seems.
I've watched my 6'2", 220lb father waste away to 140lbs as cancer overtook him. My sweet Momma deteriorated over a few weeks, losing her ability to move, reason, and even write her own name as cancer won a quick battle over her body. My grandmother faced a courageous but wicked battle with leukemia. My own body has never been the same following some damaging health issues. I gave birth to a stillborn daughter at 6 months along during my 3rd pregnancy - a child I love so much but never knew. Our precious daughter will never know what a full field of vision is like. And it's going to take us a decade to recover from 18 months of job loss. So many people suffer every day, every where, all the time. It is easy to be impacted deeply by so much pain and suffering.
From my humble - human perspective, I often think I can't stand any more suffering, for myself, or for the human race. There is so much injustice in the screwed up world. So much hunger, pain, abuse, disease, and evil. I understand we lived in a screwed up world because of sin. But none of us ever asked to be created and brought to earth to live. I'm not sure, if given the choice in the beginning, that I would ever chose to live on earth as a human. Through some of my darkest times, I've often asked God why He made me, why He made any of us, and why did He put us here?
Why did God put us here? He really doesn't need us to DO anything for Him right? He's the I AM, the ONE AND ONLY, The ALL IN ALL, the BEGINNING AND END. He can speak great things into being, or wipe them out in a sweep of hand. So that can't be the reason I'm here. Did He put us here to pass or fail some type of test? It seems a huge injustice to keep creating people for life here on earth - a life where we are destined to suffer greatly, sin often, and fail miserably. If God knew in the beginning that I would fail Him, why did He make me in His image and fill me with my first breath anyway?
I think there is an answer to the "Why am I Here" question found in Ephesians 2:10 "For we are God's workmanship, created in Christ Jesus to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do." This scripture has kept me going lately and I must keep repeating it often on a daily basis. My purpose -our purpose, is pretty simple, although we often make it more complicated. We are put here simply to DO GOOD, all day, every day, all the time, our purpose is to do good.
Yep, all this suffering and evil is unjust and none of us ever asked for it. But by doing good all the time, we can ease the suffering of those around us. We can give water to the thirsty, food to the hungry, show kindness when is isn't deserved, and love deeply. And God promises that one day, He will take his hand, reach out and touch my face, and dry my final tear. Then I will never, ever cry, hurt, or suffer anymore. Knowing this keeps me going too. So, what keeps you going?
